Back to December: Too Late to Apologize

I love Taylor Swift but I do hate her right now because she wrote the song “Back to December” and lines fit me so perfectly. It’s going to be my anniversary on the 14th of December of being single, and that calls for a celebration. Yey! OF COURSE I’m just being sarcastic.

“This is me swallowing my pride, standing in front of you, saying I’m sorry for that night,” makes me feel so plastic because that’s what I want to do. I want to fly back to Cebu and tell this one person that I am really sorry that I allowed us to break up back then, but I can’t say or do this because of pride and at the same time fear of rejection.

“It turns out freedom means nothing but missing you, wish I had realized what I had when you were mine,” just makes me want to break down because losing him was my biggest mistake and not having had done anything to have him back again just makes me more stupid.

Yes! It may seem a lie but I do love him still and if given the chance I will get back to him, I will allow myself to have the love story that we used to have. Looking back when we were still together, we were a cool couple. He had his flaws (being promiscuous and all that) and I had mine too (having full of pride and all that). We are both to be blamed for the failed relationship. And if in the event we have learnt our lessons then maybe we could be together again one day; that is if we learned our lessons.

To get back together or not, I know I loved him and he loved me too, and given love is used in the past tense, we have no other way but to move on. He moved on I guess because he easily  found  new ones but I not finding another one does not mean I have not moved on yet. It only means I am being more careful now. He was a keeper and I don’t want to waste my time on someone who is less worthy than my past. He is a Toyota Vios so I don’t want to have a car cheaper than a Vios. I need to have the more expensive ones, a BMW or Ford would suffice.

So this coming 14th of December, as I continue to search for a more expensive car than a Vios, I will not fret because I failed to do so but rather I will take it as warning that I am losing my cool, and I am wasting my time taking the public bus. Enough of the rubbing of shoulders in the bus and it’s time to cuddle inside a BMW or a Ford. It may be too late to apologize because of what happened back in December of 2009, but it’s not yet too late to start writing an entirely different love story that will topple even the highest-rated tv series of all time had ever presented.